Robert Townsend, Eddie Griffin, James Earl Jones, Don Cheadle, Marla Gibbs, Big Daddy Kane, Frank Gorshin, Sinbad, Luther Vandross, Bill Cosby
Written and directed by (and he probably made the tea too): Robert Townsend
Meteor Man – “Drug dealer people, Meteor Man’s in town!”
WHAT IS IT? It’s a ‘comedy’ superhero movie, featuring numerous big star names, including the likes of Don Cheadle and Bill Cosby! Only it was about as funny as syphilis. The Meteor Man wasn’t based on a comic but a short lived Marvel comic did follow the release of the movie. That was shit as well.
GOOD IDEA/BAD IDEA: The prospect of an original superhero movie is always a welcome one as the genre could always do with a fresh injection of ideas; however in order for the superhero to not outstay his welcome, he needs to be unique, yet likeable. The Meteor Man film attempted this by introducing an African American superhero into an industry that was predominately filled with white superheroes (Batman, Superman, Spidey etc) and then by bringing in some of the biggest black stars of the time to put in an appearance. The intentions to make it an interesting movie were all there and instead of having Meteor Man attempt to save the world, the story kept things simple by having him attempt to clean up his own neighbourhood. Despite this and the best efforts of the actors involved (and ‘comedian’ Sinbad) it just never really worked and the end result was just a run-of-the-mill superhero story that was pretty lacklustre and ultimately forgettable. Oh... and it wasn’t funny either.
WHAT’S THE STORY?
Jefferson Reed (Townsend) is an ordinary guy just trying to go about his daily business which includes trying his best to avoid bumping into the comedian Sinbad. Luckily for Jefferson he’s so far managed to escape any contact with Sinbad and because of this he’s always considered himself to have lived a very fortunate life. Well that is until all of a sudden he gets hit by a meteor and it looks as if he’s spent his last day on Earth. For most people this would be a complete kick up the asteroid, but for Jefferson being struck by a rock from space doesn’t kill him, but instead gives him powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men! Suddenly Jefferson is invulnerable, he can fly, he has heat vision and...
...he can communicate with dogs. Whilst some of these powers don’t seem all that great, the fact that Jefferson has them makes him feel as if he really should be putting them to good use. So with not much else going on that day (and with some pressure from his parents) Jefferson becomes the Meteor Man... which at least sounds a lot better than ‘Hit By A Big Freaking Rock From Space Man’!
Soon Jefferson is out and about in his neighbourhood, righting wrongs and doing good deeds, which quickly attracts the attention of the local hoodlums. Being particularly bad hoodlums, they waste no time in trying to kill Jefferson; which thankfully for him doesn’t work and so whilst they go back to the drawing board, Jefferson is left to continue doing his superhero work. However, what Jefferson didn’t take into consideration was the fact that now that he’s a superhero he will start to attract the attention of the media and the whole wide world; including ‘comedian’ Sinbad.
Despite spending his whole life trying to avoid coming into contact with Sinbad, as well as avoiding any movie or TV show featuring him, Jefferson suddenly realises that he’s about to face the inevitable. He’s about to spend time in the company of an unfunny comedian!
It’s at that point that Sinbad walks into his life to do a ‘comedic’ performance. Although the incident only lasts for a minute, perhaps two at most, it’s enough to make Jefferson want to wish himself dead! But as he’s a superhero and all, he decides there are greater concerns than this right now, so he tries his best to put the incident behind him, so that he can kick some bad guy ass...
... which he does!
With his neighbourhood free from crime, Jefferson spends the next three years successfully avoiding Sinbad... until he decides to go to the cinema to see the new Arnold Schwarzenegger movie, Jingle All The Way.
IT’S A SIN: *Sinbad isn’t funny. Statistically speaking he’s not even a comedian.
*Meteor Man is best friends with Asteroid Gal and Mars Man. He does know the Lad From Uranus... but he doesn’t like to talk about it.
*There was never a sequel to The Meteor Man. This was a blessing of epic proportions.